Mixed Nutts

How about that Houston Nutt and his ability to, at least on the surface, ignore all the outside distractions and pesky things like having to cover for lies and spin, and do his job? After all, the man has been compared on more than one occasion to used car salesmen and politiicans.

If this football coaching thing doesn't work out after this season, what with Daddy leaving and all, Nutt could always go into either of those fields and be successful. Only thing is, he might need to develop a little thicker skin if he chooses the latter. Hiding behind the wifeys skirt ala the "Haters to the North" letter usually gets a pol dismissed as a wimp.

Maybe he can get a text from a certain female news anchor for advice, provided he can change the subject from their "mutual charitable interests".

His life and career have also been compared to a soap opera. How about a Jack Handey style voiceover? Will Houston elbow the band director out of the way and direct the UA band even if the Auburn kicker misses 5 or 6 kicks, which could be the only way the Hogs win this game?

Will Houston whip out his UA-issued cell phone and call or text anyone during the game?

Is there anything Nutt could do to cause his boss to hold him accountable?

Will Houston, Dennis Franchione, Joe Pa, and Mike Gundy star in a "reality tv show" called "Coaches behaving badly?". Put the four of them in a house, or better yet, on an island. Send some other out of work coaches there and voila! Instant ratings.

Watch them manuever. Joe Pa: "who drank my prune juice?" Nutt, "I confess, Gundy did it". Gundy: "I'm a 40 year old man! If you want to come up here and say that..., you drank it, Nuttsack!" Nutt: "No, I didn't. Nothing could be further from the truth". "Hold that thought, I gotta go to the bathroom for a #2. I don't pass things, I always have the runs".